Dear Heavenly Master: FROM: "ME" THE DOG Dear God: Why do humans smell the flowers, but seldom, if ever, smell one another? Dear God: When we get to heaven, can we sit on your couch? Or is it still the same old story? Dear God: Why are there cars named after the jaguar, the cougar, the mustang, the colt, the stingray, and the rabbit, but not ONE named for a dog? How often do you see a cougar riding around? We do love a nice ride! Would it be so hard to rename the "Chrysler Eagle" the " Chrysler Beagle"? Dear God: If a dog barks his head off in the forest and no human hears him, is he still a bad dog? Dear God: We dogs can understand human verbal instructions, hand signals, whistles, horns, clickers, beepers, scent ID's, electromagnetic energy fields, and Frisbee flight paths. What do humans understand? Dear God: More meatballs, less spaghetti, please. Dear God: Are there mailmen in Heaven? If there are, will I have to apologize? Dear God: Let me give you a list of just some of the things I must remember to be a good dog. 1 I will not eat the cats' food before they eat it or after they throw it up. 2. I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc., just because I like the way they smell. 3. The Litter Box is not a cookie jar. 4. The sofa is not a 'face towel'. 5. The garbage collector is not stealing our stuff. 6. I will not play tug-of-war with Dad's underwear when he's on the toilet. 7. I don’t need to suddenly stand straight up when I'm under the coffee table. 8. I must shake the rainwater out of my fur before entering the house - not after. 9. The cat is not a 'squeaky toy' - so when I play with him and he makes that noise, it’s usually not a good thing. Dear God we are so glad you created us dogs to bring humans so much help and happiness.  May many more dogs in the world become useful dogs, healthy dogs, happy dogs, safe dogs. May humans all over the world learn to value us dogs as precious gifts from you, and never neglect or abuse us.  May humans everywhere learn to properly train us and help us learn how to control our God given doggie instincts so that we will have the best manners possible during our stay here in the people world.  May we have Your help to be good doggie ambassadors to help people who do not yet love dogs, who may be afraid of dogs, or who may even now be abusing and hurting dogs, to see the light and learn to value us the way you value us, dear Lord and Faithful Heavenly Master.  If you were not such a faithful Creator, how else could we have become so famous for our ability to be man's most faithful friend, since we are in our personality reflecting YOUR much greater and perfect faithfulness. Amen